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Posted by alicia on May 27, 2004 in Life
From Wild at Heart by John Eldredge:
Desire reveals design, and design reveals destiny.
Posted by alicia on May 26, 2004 in Life
If you read Dan’s blog then you know my car broke down yesterday. Today it is in the shop and I am stranded at home. But that is ok, I have several things I need to get done.
I started the only raw food thing again this week. I would like to keep it up until we go on our vacation (which is in June). Dan’s mom gave me a book full of raw recipes. I hope to pick out a few and go to the grocery store tomorrow so I can sample them over the weekend.
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Posted by alicia on May 24, 2004 in Life
I just read this on Alan Creech’s blog and I want to share it with you.
I’m beginning to wonder if we’re the only fairly stable family with children in our neighborhood. I’m sure that’s not the case, but as many problems as we’ve seen with parents and their kids, or one parent and their live-in with their kids, or kids crying to us about their family situations - wow. It’s enough to make you depressed. Not that I didn’t realize people were fooked up before now. It’s just becoming more apparent when some kid knocks on your door crying and says they can’t live with their parents any more. It’s hard to know what to do. You help how you can I suppose. You support them, you pray for them. And people, this is a very “normal” neighborhood. We’re not talking about inner-city crack houses here. Yeah, shun the suburbs. They’re evil. There’s nothing you can do there. Wow, I think I’ll punch a wall if I hear that again.
Of course people go in their garages and into their houses and don’t show their faces again. Of course they do. You think they don’t do the same thing downtown? Of course people are selfish and tired and don’t want to be bothered. I’m the same way sometimes. I don’t usually worry about “reaching my neighborhood” because it usually doesn’t work all that well to try. I guess we’re back to natural vs. artificial. I prefer the natural. It’ll come to you. Now, please, don’t jump on my ass about not being “intentional.” I’m not saying we shouldn’t be. I just wonder how much of it is for us and how much for them. I wonder if we’d do just naturally better just being one of them wherever we are - just being a person like our neighbors - not feeling like we live in a cathedral and they in poor, broken households. Listen, my household has some cracks too. OK, I’m not even sure what I’m saying. People - people live in these neighborhoods on the edges of cities, broken people who need the glue of God in their lives. And I’m broken too, perhaps not so much as many, but still being glued back together - into the whole person I was intended to be. So, wherever I am, maybe I share some of the glue. Peace be to us all.
The part that stood out to me the most was about being intentional vs. being natural. I get an uneasiness when I here Christians talk about being intentional. Maybe I don’t understand what is meant by being intentional. I guess I am referring to the pressure or sense of duty that some Christians feel to building relationships, build community, etc. I have experienced Christians intentionally trying to build a relationship with me and I have intentionally tried to build relationships with others. More often than not it felt artificial. And this will sound weird, but if I was the one trying to be intentional I found it hard to truly love the person, instead I felt it was more important for them to feel loved. Is there a difference? Yeah, I was trying to do what was necessary to care for the relationship instead of the person. I think this is really obvious in a group who’s focus has become building community instead of loving people. What happens to the people that do not fit into their community? Anyway, I look back and wonder why those people ever put up with me trying to be a good Christian and be intentional. I know it felt artificial to them as well.
Could it be that they were so lonely, so unloved, so hurt, and so lost that they would even cling to the psuedo-relationship that came out of me fulfilling my “duty”?? Isn’t that a horrible thought! Me capitalizing on someone else’s lonliness so that I can feel better about being a Christian. The sad thing is that I think it happens a lot in the church and people do not even realize what they are doing. Or, if they do realize it they give a reason as to why it is ok. So, how would it have been different if I had let things naturually happen? Could relationships have developed where love was expressed? Could God have brought the two lives together for a time of sharing, bonding, healing and love without me trying to be intentional?
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Posted by alicia on May 22, 2004 in Life
Well, I took my nap earlier while Dan was relfecting about the conference and now he is sleeping and I will share about the past couple of days.
I can’t say that I’ve really heard anything new this weekend about the house/simple/organic church. However, the discussions did encourage several ideas that Dan & I have talked about. Like, our desire to experience this church life together before we involve other people. Also, I really saw the importance of making it known that we respect other aspects of church life.
One thing that I have enjoyed learning about is the Open Church experience. It is just so simple. Something that I think would flow naturally out of place of true community.
Posted by alicia on May 19, 2004 in Life
So, what is one of the best parts of summer?? Vacation!!! Yesterday I read the latest copy of Organic Style. There was an article about the cleanest beaches in America. Most of the beaches are on the west coast, but there was one in North Carolina. It is Cape Hatteras and Ocracoke Island. After sharing the idea with Dan we decided to go there sometime in June….we are even going to camp out! Ocracoke Island has tons of outdoors activities like swimming (duh), windsurfing, hiking, camping, fishing, kayaking to name a few. I’m already looking forward to it.
Posted by alicia on May 17, 2004 in Life
Due to some non-drowsy sinus medication that I took right before going to bed I have been awake since 4:00 am. Note to all: non-drowsy medicine will keep you awake, despite what your husband may say. 
During our time experimenting with simple church stuff we have been reading The Imitation of Christ. I’m glad that Dan had the idea to include this in our worship. Meditating on the words of Thomas a Kempis has really encouraged transformation for me. I don’t know what this says about how my spiritual life has been lately, but, each part we read leaves me feeling uncomfortable. But through more meditation/prayer the discomfort soon leads to humility and then a desire for change develops. Few writings besides the Bible have encouraged such transformation in me. I am thankful for the writings of Kempis and how they can help this wandering girl on her Journey.
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Posted by alicia on May 15, 2004 in Life
Today I spent most of the day in a training seminar for work. The seminar was about flexibility and was facilitated by Annette Lang. I enjoyed the training and learned some cool stuff about how to stretch my clients.
I have nothing else of interest to blog about today. Sorry.
Posted by alicia on May 14, 2004 in Life
I’ve finished my first semester at Towson University! My last final was yesterday. It was good to be back in school, but I will be very happy when I graduate. I really hope that over the next year I can gain the education and experience I need to get a job that interest me more than the one I have now. But until then….Brick Bodies, build your body with brick!
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Posted by alicia on May 10, 2004 in Life
I visited with my family over the weekend. Sometimes it is hard for me to visit them….emotionally hard. Seeing them struggle from day to day breaks my heart. I wish I could help them. I wish things were different for them. I wish my mom didn’t have to work that horrible job. I wish my sister was enaged to a man who would treat her like she deserves. I wish my grandmother was in better health. I wish my brother didn’t have to stress about having money to pay for college.
Sometimes I feel guilty for leaving them, especially when I feel like I could be helping them more if I were with them.
I dunno….its just a very difficult situation that is probably hard to understand unless you have experienced something similar.
Posted by alicia on May 5, 2004 in Life
The end of the semester is drawing near. I have been so stressed this week because of projects and tests. But now I don’t have anything big until finals (which are next week). So I’m going to try to relax some. I’m going to visit my family over the weekend. I can’t wait to see them! It will be good for me to have a mini-vacation right before finals.
For everyone out there interested in health & fitness….Get Active America week starts May 17th. This is one week set aside every year to try to encourage Americans to incorporate exercise into their daily living. During this week most (if not all) health clubs in American open their doors to the public….for free. So…go clubbing!! Here is your chance to try different aspects of exercise for free!