our small group thing

i want to blog about our small group thing, but i’m not sure what i want to say, therefore, i just plan on rambling.

our small group thing meets on monday nights. this past monday was like a really bad date. to be honest, we’ve had a couple bad dates lately. the bad dates affect all of us and leave us wondering about our future together. over the past few days we’ve been talking, emailing, and blogging about the “situation” aka…bad dates. yet, no resolution has been set. in fact, i am more confused and concerned than i was before all the talking, emailing, & blogging.
it’s becoming apparent to me that we each have very different ideas of “what to do” as a group. though we each mention our interests, it seems that we seldom understand the interests of others, and we never try to link them together. or, that when we do decide on a “course”, we neglect who we are as individuals. lately, our evenings have been full of generic activities that we would probably never ever do, except for the fact that they are things we learned to do at church. i don’t want to be limited to my past experiences, but to let them serve as the springboard for diving into a spirit-led life.

about 2 months ago i wrote in my journal about one of our bad dates and i want to share it here….(or atleast the clean parts).

yesterday was monday, so we had our group. lately we have been reading a small book of the Bible and coming together to talk about it. sounds like a decent plan. God knows it has been successful the hundreds of other times i’ve done this. but for us, it has proven to be a waste of time. without purpose & direction our converstaions are shallow & somewhat boring.
so, after our “discussion” last night we tried to discuss what we will do next. you would think that we could come up with something that halfway appeals to everyone, but, no.
what is our purpose as a group?
of course we dont know how to function & encourage growth b/c we lack identity & purpose. when we first came together we were all in desperate need of healing (for various reasons). it was during that time that we bonded with one another and shared life together. but now without identity or purpose we wonder aimlessly from week to week without significant changes or growth.
i dont want to sound like we are a company and we need to set our buisness goals….i get enough of that at work. but i do wonder how we will reach what God has instore for us if we don’t even question why we are together. just as last year, healing, was an obvious gift that we each needed to receive. with that in mind, we started our journey. though what we did from week to week may not differ much from what we do now, we had purpose, we had identity, and we knew what God had instore for us. but now…..
i believe that if we look, it will be revealed. the gift we need to receive, our purpose, our identity…it will be revealed and eventually fulfilled by the One who revealed it. the way to fill this void and put an end to the regular bad dates lies within us. we can continue to try different things each week, hoping to find the magic recipe that will give us the food that we need, or we could consider asking for our purpose to be revealed.

Tags: Life